Case Study #1
Couple having sex once a year for the last 5 years
This couple presented close to divorce. The husband was hurt, angry and distant, the wife felt no sexual desire and was not available for sex more than once a year. On a scale of 1-10 she was experiencing depression at a 7.5. During the first visit, the therapist noted severe lethargy bordering on almost immobility in the wife, therefore the therapist’s first goal was to treat the wife’s depression. To treat the wife’s depression in order to allow her to be available for sex or marital intimacy. Specific suggestions were given during this initial visit regarding help for her depression (in 30 years of providing sex and marital therapy any underlying depression or anxiety is often treated without the use of medications within the first 1-3 sessions). In the second visit, the wife’s depression was now down to a 3.5 out of 10. The husband expressed resentment because the wife had lost her job a year ago and was still unemployed. Because her depression was improved she was able to commit to a search for new employment that her husband requested. In the second visit, the communication was opened up. The third visit the couple has now reported having sex twice in the last week when before they only had sex once in an entire year. In the fourth visit, the wife was able to find a job, not in her area of expertise, which was able to tide them over and relieve the husband’s stress, communication was deepened. They continued to have sex twice a week having broken the pattern of yearly sex in the last five years. In the fifth visit, the husband was finally able to open up on something that had hurt him deeply which the therapist encouraged. Working through this blockage in his heart allowed the couple to experience a deeper connection and love. The couple’s communication skills advanced. In the sixth visit, the couple is feeling reborn in their relationship adding regular sex and feeling and looking for ways to add more, and looking towards future goals. The couple experienced new love and considered renewing their vows.